Top tips for raising kids who love to learn: 10/01

Stanford Report, October 17, 2001

Top tips for raising kids who love to learn

BY MEREDITH ALEXANDER

Deborah Stipek and Kathy Seal's book, Motivated Minds: Raising Children to Love Learning, is full of practical advice for parents. Here are a few of their top tips:

Relationships are absolutely critical, Stipek says, if you want to have influence over your children. "The child has to believe that you're a team, and that rules are there genuinely to assist them," she says. Don't begin a pattern of berating your children for poor grades or lack of interest. Ask them questions that get at the root of the problem, and show you support their efforts.
If you take responsibility for your child's learning, the child will not. Children need to be given the autonomy to choose to learn. This is often true in the classroom, too. Stipek cites the example of a teacher who always gave a regimented assignment to her students. They refused to finish the work. But when she let the children pick among three different assignments, they were suddenly excited by the project.
Guiding children toward learning can happen anytime, not just when your child is doing homework. If you are sitting at the dinner table or driving your child to soccer practice, take advantage of that time to talk about your own intellectual interests or engage children in storytelling or problem solving.
Don't go overboard with outward rewards (such as candy, toys or money) for your children's achievements. "Learning is satisfying in and of itself, through the sense of accomplishment," Stipek says.
Don't be afraid to give critical feedback to your children. Constructive criticism can make children feel a sense of competence in their ability to do a task better.